Once again with the BF!

The boyfriend is made again, rather hurt and bothered.  He read my journal/goal setting book.  Not sure how much he read but he did. I at least know he read the last page which talks about me being glad he didnt leave and that I have secrets.  Ha!

Because it's shaped like a Ribbon !@#$%

Another Panera temptation. Why do I want one Just Because It's Shaped Like a Ribbon? Why?  #CleanEatingTorture!

Chocolate Pecan "Grandma"?

This is Panera's Chocolate Pecan Babka.  Babka is polish for grandma.  I don't think that's a good name for a yummy looking calorie-filled dessert.  I WANT ONE! BAAAAAAABKA!

Dreams

I’m working today. Maybe focusing on that will take my mind of things I really want and desire, money, vacations, facials, manicures and pedicures, clothing and hair stylist, grocery shopping, clothes shopping, sleeping, great love making, 3-5 bedroom home with 2-3.5 bathrooms, garage, and nice landscaping, recognition for being awesome, fitness, strength, power, respect and admiration, love, passport fully stamped from my travels, a great set of luggage and pots and pans would be nice but that goes along with the house and travels without saying but just thought i'd put it out there. This list to be continued...

Today's Random Thoughts

12:23pm - My boyfriend made me feel sad today so I’m in a phunky old mood! I was happy this morning but he so ruined it.  That’s not what boyfriends are for. And when I try to talk about how I’m feeling he only says I’m complaining or asking too many questions. He’s freaking impossible. I really need to dump his ass for good! I really really do!

### This was from Monday, October 15, 2012. I forgot to post. The day turned out ok. I met up with my girls to run and sweat so all my drama fell flat, that is until I got home. It all came back and I hate him. I really do.###...8:20am Oct 15, 2012

Today's random moments

Today will be a great day in spite of my choice to stay in a relationship that’s not going anywhere. Today will be a great day because I will focus on my work; I will set more goals, review the old goals, and finish this darn book! I will also figure out this tpf file before my supervisor returns and takes it over. That is goal number 1! - 8:16am

Just read that my former co-worker’s husband passed away this weekend.  The story she wrote about him, his life, and what he loved was so moving. The love in the story brought tears.  Reminded me of what love and family is really about. We all must have a positive perspective on this journey.  Look for the good at all times, give of you unconditionally, and love no matter what.  That’s what we’re all missing in our lives, real love. – 9:03a.m.

What's on my mind? D'Angelo How Does It Feel. Impromptu get-away. Reading. The Ocean. Sun. Breathing. :-) – 10:28a.m. 

Charles Barkley started the year off getting busted on a DUI and on his way to fornication. When he said he is not a role model he was absolutely correct. How can you be a role model when you say the 1st thing that comes to your mind whether it hurts someone else or not, drink and drive, and cheat on your wife. Charles claims he wanted to run for governor in Alabama. HA!

I actually do not think this will hurt his chance of becoming governor however, it will give his competition something to use against him as if they needed anything.

I would like to know what is up with washed up celebrities vieing for public office positions. Is there no standard of expertise, experience, or rank that you have to go through to acutally hold office of senator, governor, or mayor?

**this was written jan 1, 2009 hanging in my drafts folder so i figured i'd post it.*** 

OLDEST AND LONGEST MARRIED COUPLE IN THE WORLD

Zelmyra and Herbert Fisher have set a world record as the oldest living couple married the longest.

A Craven County couple are in the Guinness World Records book. The two did nothing outlandish such as sky-diving upside down, dancing for days, taking the longest lawn mower ride or having the most tattoos. No, Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher of the Brownsville community have been married for more than 84 years. That is a feat in itself. They have the world record of the longest marriage for a living couple. They can thank their granddaughter Iris Godette for getting the recognition. She submitted the information to the Guinness Book of Records.

The information was apparently checked by Guinness and a certificate was given to the couple. However, when you ask Herbert about the Guinness recognition, he just says, "Oh, Yeah?" The recognition has not changed their life. He still looks at her with love and concern, as she looks toward him as if he will give her strength and guidance. They have lived for more than 50 years in a house near the Coastal Carolina Regional Airport. They lived in James City before that but the land was purchased for apartments and the two moved.

Herbert was born June 10, 1905. His hearing is going but his mind is sharp. Zelmyra was born Dec. 10, 1907. She uses a walker to get around the house and yard. The two of them can still give their reasons for marrying on May 13, 1924. "He was not mean; he was not a fighter," Zelmrya said. "He was quiet and kind. He was not much to look at but he was sweet. "Herbert said Zelmyra never gave him any trouble. "No, no trouble at all. We never argued, but we might have disagreed," he said.

Norma Godette, one of the couple's five children, said her parents have gotten along well through the years."One time, mama wanted to work. Daddy told her she could not work, that he could take care of the family. She slipped down to Cherry Point and got a job as a caretaker there," Godette said. "Well, it was done; she got the job. I had to let it be," Herbert said.Different religions did not tear the two apart. He is a member of Pilgrim Chapel Missionary Baptist Church . She is a member of Jones Chapel African Methodist Episcopal Zion Church . The churches are in James City , where they both grew up. For all of their married life they have attended their own churches. They go their own ways on Sunday morning.She reads the Bible daily.The two watch television together. "We separate when the baseball comes on," Zelmyra said.

Herbert loves baseball, especially the Atlanta Braves. He also enjoys golf, because one of his son-in-laws plays the game. They have no secret or sage advice as to why their marriage has lasted so long. "I didn't know I would be married this long," Herbert said. "But I lived a nice holy life and go to church every Sunday. "Yes sir, anything for her. "Zelmyra said Herbert was the only boyfriend she ever had. "We got along good," she said. "There was no trouble." She said she is not tired of seeing him. "I didn't think I'd be married this long. He is quiet," she said.

Zelmyra said her husband had no annoying habits. They both said they shared the title of "boss." The two sit on the porch and as a train goes by they count the cars. They also watch the neighbors who walk by." They were excellent parents," said Norma Godette. "We were poor, but we didn't do without a thing. If he had two cents he saved one cent." Herbert worked as a mechanic at the Coca-Cola Bottling Company in New Bern for 35 years. He took a bicycle, caught a cab or had a neighbor drive him to work. That hard work and savings put all five of the children through college.

Inside the house are plaques, letters of recognition, and awards that both the Fishers and their children received for accomplishments in civic duties and church. The house where they raised their children has two sitting rooms and three bedrooms. Now that the children are grown, the Fishers enjoy having a bedroom for each. Herbert Fisher can stay up until the last ball is thrown in the ballgame he is watching. And he does.Herbert makes his bed each day and sweeps his floor. He also checks on his wife as she rests.Between the rests, they enjoy their children, ten grandchildren, nine great-grandchildren and nieces and nephews. Both say that if they had it to do over, they would not change their life.

**March 4, 2009 this was hanging out in my drafts section so figured i'd finally post it.**

So this is the revelation I received this morning.

I need to live below my means. LOL I know. Duh, right? However its so depressing living below your means. For example if I make 40,000 I should really be living on 30,000. Why? Because:

1) if I'm really making 40,000 a year, I'm only actually bring home about 30,000 after taxes. its the net not the gross that you have free to spend.

2) uncle Sam thinks anyone without children or a spouse make too much and should pay more taxes than everyone else. So whether I claim 0 and pay the piper all year and look for my big break in April or if I cheat a little during the year, claim 1 and pay at the end, Sam still gets his cut either way.

3) I want to leave an inheritance for my nieces and nephews. Instead of leaving debt, I want to leave a trust and let them live off the fat of the land. Teach them how to manage money at an early age, develop business skills, and encourage them to look beyond their immediate pockets and into the future bank rolls they could hold, companies they could own, land, and royalties earned without working. I saw a show called "The fabulous life of young hot Royalty". There's a family in Germany who is simply rich just because their ancestors were postal workers.

Take 22-year-old Prince Albert Von Thurn Und Taxis. He's heir to a powerful German Dynasty credited with modernizing what we know of as today's postal system. When he turned 18 he inherited one of Europe's largest fortunes and is now worth $2 billion dollars-- making him the youngest billionaire in the world. Oh and the massive 500 room German palace he grew up in? That belongs to him too.

So I'm thinking, I'm not going to invent anything anytime soon so how can I work on leaving an inheritance and not an inherited debt. I must first get out of debt and live below my means so that I can store up funds to buy land, real estate, and start a business. Then I can work on my plan for inheritance building.

4) by watching and hearing various stories of white people, people from India, Mexicans, etc Black people are the only people who do not help one another, who spend more than they make, who buy to impress their neighbors and friends while stockpiling bills, who buy a car they cannot afford while living in an apartment more lavish than the house they should be buying, etc. Because we are so depressed from living on the bottom, being born on the bottom, starting out on the bottom, that when we see light, get a good job, find a piece of money, the first thing we do is spend it and worry about the bills later. I have been spending every penny to the max, not leaving room for mishaps, uncontrolled circumstances, no money in the bank at the end of the month, stretching dollars until they break and cant be sown back together. Living on your own, being independent does not mean asking mom, dad, and uncle for handouts every time I get in a jam. I do not believe it is the White man keeping us down. I believe their are enough intelligent black people to start their own business, hire and fire people, produce a good product, provide quality service, and be prosperous beyond the status quo diddy understands this and he has no talent whatsoever, but he has made his ability to bs and hustle his cash cow. J understands this and so does T.I. and 50 cent. They all came from nothing, out the hood, did their dirt, and saw a way to turn that dirt making ability into an empire. I know this is a far stretch and they are talented rappers but they have other business ventures that are working for them making money when they are doing nothing. How dumb can that be? Not that celebrity success is the basis of my whole philosophy but it has its place.

5) I am tired of living pitiful enjoying a little now and trying to figure out the rest later.

There's more to my ah ha moment but i'm tired of typing, i know you're tired of reading, and I'm distracted anyway LOL my attention has moved on to something else. But I thought I'd share in my revelation which I prayed for when asking God what I should do about my apartment situation. And believe it or not, he actually gave me an answer LOL !


**this was written may 27, 2010 hanging out in my drafts so i figured i'd finally post it.**

Personal post of the moment

Feeling in a slump today, why, I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I did my part but he didn’t do his. Relationships can surely suck sometimes.

I wanna be in love. - 9:54am

9:57am - Feel like i go to church outta pure obligation not because I really want to.  I dont feel I really learn anything more or different than I already knew. Is that wrong or bad? wonder how many other ppl feel the same way.

10:13am - trying to stay off my phone is going to get me in trouble. So easily distracted. I have much work to do but ...here I am.

12:38pm - Just read this in October's issue of Readers Digest, one way to find happiness is to write down 3 good things that happened to you each day for at least 6 months and note how much better you'll feel.  I think I'm going to try this starting with today. Maybe I'll make it a new blog page or something so I can gave it separated out and more easily accessible. Would hate to have to hunt for it every time I needed a refresher.

3:39pm - I'm in love...with me!

3:41pm - And so he finally speaks. 

My Co-worker

My co-worker is dumb!